These are the words Rev. Bob Lawrence shared with us as his reflection on his time as our Pastor. These words were shared during our Service of Farewell on Sunday, December 11, 2011.
As I think about reflecting on the past 2+ years of ministry among you, I find myself thinking about the word “reflect.” I believe, in this case, that is a most apt word because my life, from this point on, will be a reflection of our time together. In fact, my life has already been reflecting our time together. I am, without a doubt, a much better person, and a much better Pastor because of my time here. And for that I am extremely grateful.
As we prepare to part and each seek the future to which our still-speaking God has called us, I would like to share with you the following thoughts.
The phrase that is found most often in our sacred texts is “Be not afraid.” It was the phrase proclaimed by the angels as they announced the birth of Jesus, and it was the first thing Jesus said to his disciples when he appeared before them behind locked doors after the resurrection. It is also the phrase that you and I have in common from our similar pasts of responding to a dreaded and deadly disease called AIDS. In the midst of watching an entire generation of SF’s gay men die, I learned, just as this community learned, that sometimes all you can do is show up… sometimes all you can do is stand there like the lion in the Wizard of Oz with your knees knocking and your voice shaking as you cry out for relief. You and I know what it means to stare death in the face and to hear the still, small voice of God from deep within proclaim, “Be not afraid.” We have learned that, in the face of adversity, doing anything, even something that doesn’t work, is better than doing nothing at all. As Martin Luther King, Jr said, “In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.” Say something… DO something… even if you think it may be the wrong thing. For the greatest wrong one can commit in the face of adversity is to do nothing. I hope that is how you will remember my time among you. We may have made mistakes along the way, but no one can say we didn’t try. In the face of adversity, we stood strong and boldly continued proclaiming God’s radical and extravagant welcome.
So, tonight, I invite you to remember the confidence with which you let go of your safe past and rose to meet the call of God and the call of your fellow humans in your response to HIV/AIDS. I ask you to remember that you cannot sail to distant shores without losing sight of the safety of the harbor. I ask you to remember the words of our scriptures and the words that we have lived together these past two years, “Be not afraid.”
In closing, I would like to read one of my favorite quotes from Thomas Merton.
“My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going.
I do not see the road ahead of me.
I cannot know for certain where it will end.
Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think that I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so.
But I believe that the desire to please you does, in fact, please you.
And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing.
I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire.
And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road though I may know nothing about it.
Therefore will I trust you always though I may seem lost and in the shadow of death.
I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.”
